A Flash Between Two Darknesses

Peace exists underneath the repeating of conscious thought. This is the plain truth that most people prefer to forget. Neither symbolized nor expressed within catchy phrases. It is merely wiped out. And whatever is left of you gradually vanishes.

Just two more generations, maybe less, and you disappear from memory. Your tales dwindle, evaporating like the early mist. Your things are scattered, taken by people who never met you. A stranger comes to your home. The images that you captured hang on the walls, unlabeled, devoid of meaning. Everything about you dissolves into mist, eventually fading to stillness.

That is not tragedy; that is design. Once clarity occurs, movement starts.

The Illusion Of The Monument

Structures degrade, names dissolve. The final- lasting result of a project, relationship, or life plan is seldom exactly as we imagined it when we first started. Unknowingly, most of us pursue work, money, fame, and recognition. Thus, gathering a heap of fragmented memories. Are they indeed proof of endurance? Certainly not.

Long ago, Marcus Aurelius understood a subtle truth. Fame lasts for a short time, just as is mystery. Both will eventually result in death. The applause subsides, and the words chiseled in stone fade. Time brings silence to everything. But beneath it all, one thing continues living, moment to moment.

Now is where life is truly lived. Before this, life was a puzzle pieced together from the memory mosaic. After now, one guesses at what could happen in the future based on hopes and fears. Everything is gathered into the present or lost entirely.

This essay does not ask which element is retained. This is where thoughts follow a winding course. "What am I doing with the only moment that is real?" Illusions crack apart, and freedom arises.

The Closed System

Human life cannot be eternal; thus, the need to rely on other people may have to be re-evaluated. The following principle is believed throughout the world: find a person who provides you with security. The implication is that one individual will stabilize your emotions, bear your burdens, and maintain tranquility for you. Initially, it may appear pleasant and even benevolent, but it eventually fails under pressure. It is based on the assumption that the equilibrium of your soul is external.

There can be no excuse for freedom. For Sartre, there can be no excuses because you must either accept or reject life as it is presented to you. Excusing yourself from the feeling you cannot change by blaming somebody for that is just avoiding what you already bear. There is no option for passing the burden onto another's shoulders because it will come back.

Bowen's differentiation is when you stand your grounds and remain connected at the same time. This state is hard to achieve because, in general, you need to be able to face some challenge without withdrawing. Moreover, you must be aware of your actions, but nobody tells you the rules for that because you should create them for yourself.

The inner process in the realm of thoughts is nobody else's concern. Your balance cannot depend on anybody's effort because you are responsible for your mental processes. Nobody else can provide you with such stable states for a long time.

Calm and peaceful life originates in self-reliance. This principle can work forever because it does not have to please anything else except yourself. Imagine an inner state of being calm, steady, and attentive despite the weather. 

Self-reliance leads to peaceful existence, not dependency on another person's emotions. This position is stable since it answers only to itself. Imagine a state of readiness and tranquility, which remains constant despite the storm raging around. That is how the concept of ataraxia was viewed by the Greeks. Feelings exist, but they do not dominate. Groundedness is rooted inside oneself, not in noise coming from outside.

The Hidden Game

This is where it becomes more complicated. This is something felt but rarely described. The connection between people involves not only feelings but also decisions.

Underneath care, devotion, and joint activity, there is something different that is self-interest. A hidden drive underneath all kindness. It tends towards places where advantage emerges. Actions aimed at giving are also performed with the expectation of receiving something. Trust arises, and so does leverage. Moments spent together bear importance, although one eye remains open. Even proximity pays attention to the relationship.

There is peace between people, but it is possible only with careful organization. The point made by Hobbes was accurate: cooperation develops, but there is no guarantee for its presence. It may last, and it may break down under the pressure of circumstances. Machiavelli explored the matter further. Loyalty can emerge, but treachery is likely to appear alongside. Where there is trust, there will be cold calculations.

Current psychology is supportive of some assumptions formed by philosophers centuries ago. There are traits of character that people used to whisper about: dishonesty, arrogance and self-regard, as well as emotional detachment. These qualities happen more often than we expect, and they are quite common in many people, rather than peculiarities of personality.

Just because people look harmless doesn't mean that they will show such behavior. Self-interest is everywhere and manifests itself even in silence. It changes the way that you step forward, gradually but definitely.

Despite how long something lasts, it can be perceived as war, misunderstanding, and conspiracies. However, imagine being advised to seize the opportunity. Everything takes place thanks to what will come next. Choosing sides will not solve anything. Having two sides at once will.

The Balance

Take into account the here and now, maintaining an eye on what will come. Love without being consumed by the needs of others. Have faith in another person while knowing the dangers that exist. Doubt does not reign supreme, instead it's the stability that prevails. The sensation of living through each individual second is strangely simple. The constant worry about protecting oneself is draining. But when awareness is coupled with consciousness of the current moment, it's right at home.

A  Different Kind of Hope

From all of this emerges a kind of odd hope. That appears is not despair, but rather clarity of vision. There’s nothing handed down to you when you stop living toward a future year by year. Stability is found deep inside of you, not somewhere else, and passing it to other people feels bizarre. The very same goes for relationships: they have their own rules, they require facing harsh realities, not letting feelings just float away. And then it hits you—suddenly and unexpectedly.

Lightness takes over. Not because you've planned it that way, but because you’ve let go of what used to bind you to memories. Others no longer hold your fragments together. Their actions make perfect sense, even when hard to take. Shock wears off effortlessly, leaving you simply seeing, clearly and calmly.

Final Positioning

The process starts with a simple blink—short, not just in story, but literally so. Amidst the long periods of silence, awareness becomes active, and suddenly a few specific tasks become clear. You are meant to feel now—really feel, without restrictions. Take care of your inner life, maintaining stability within yourself. Then move into the territory of relationships with wisdom, making calculated steps. 

Stability is not a gift; it is built within. With time, only those things will remain that have been able to sustain themselves. The system will reward only those individuals who are paying attention. One who does not look into the eyes of the world will go nowhere. The statues will tumble down, the trust will change sides, but the awareness will remain. 

Start by centering yourself. Be observant, yet be realistic about what you see, and then make your decisions wisely. You may be rushed for time, but stay aware of what is happening in the present, and keep your spirit prepared.

Stay attentive, stay independent, stay wise. Accept that everyone is acting out of their own selfish motives, but allow the clarity of your thoughts to hold a little compassion as well.

References 

Benner, E. (2013). Deception and good faith. Oxford University Press EBooks, 212–224. https://doi.org/10.1093/acprof:oso/9780199653638.003.0019

The BIG Thinkers Leaving Certificate Politics and Society. (n.d.). https://www.ncca.ie/media/2602/thomas-hobbes-v2.pdf

Figueroa, P. (2025). To live free or to make excuses: in defense of Sartre’s (Revised) concept of radical freedom. Dianoia the Undergraduate Philosophy Journal of Boston College, 7–34. https://doi.org/10.6017/dupjbc.v12i1.19275

How to Analyze People With DARK PSYCHOLOGY 8 books in 1. (n.d.). Retrieved April 11, 2026, from https://dn720001.ca.archive.org/0/items/how-to-analyze-people-with-dark/How-to-Analyze-People-With-Dark.pdf

The Bowen Center for the Study of the Family. (2024). Differentiation of Self. The Bowen Center for the Study of the Family. https://www.thebowencenter.org/differentiation-of-self

Lost and Found with Marcus Aurelius – by Marcia Yudkin. (2023, March 18). Modern Stoicism. https://modernstoicism.com/lost-and-found-with-marcus-aurelius-by-marcia-yudkin/

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